We are our own worst critic.
For anyone who has been to RISE you will understand what I’m talking about and for those of you who haven’t… let me explain.
We all have days. Days where we need to hear a friend say, “MOVEMENT IS MOVEMENT, fast or slow, you are doing it!” Rachel Hollis talks about how we are our own worst critic. We let that little voice of negativity in our head run our lives and ruin our day. At RISE, Rachel told us to give the negative voice in our head a name, to picture what she looks like and imagine how she acts. I know. I know! You probably think this sounds weird, but honestly, it is so helpful.
The negative voice in my head is Barb, she isn’t outgoing, she isn’t fun, she doesn’t get along with anyone from my girl gang and she is just plain ol’ crotchety. She is one of those women that stands in the corner flipping out her hair as she is pointing out everyone’s flaws and failures, but yet, she herself has never tried anything to break away from the ordinary.
The take-away here is that when that voice starts to creep in, we are supposed to say, “Not today, ____”
So for those of you who know me, you know I love to run. There is no greater sense of freedom and well-being than when my shoes hit the pavement. However, with surgery and chemo, I’ve been pretty wiped, and the body de-conditions pretty fast! Just today, I was on the treadmill and was able to run 2 miles without stopping. It was a victory, but all I could hear was Barb, “you are a marathon runner, why are you so excited to run 2 miles? Pssh! Pathetic!” It took me a couple minutes, but I was able to say, “not today, Barb!”
I did it. Sure I’m not where I was 9 months ago, but that’s ok, life happens. Instead I chose to remind myself of the following:
- Progress over Perfection
- Talk to yourself like you would someone you love. – Brene Brown
- We all have to start from somewhere
- Comparison is the death of all joy, and the only person I need to be better than is the one I was yesterday. – Girl, Wash Your Face: Rachel Hollis
- I’m doing this for me, and only me (well, and the runner’s high)
Wait a minute. You’ve never heard of a runner’s high?! It’s a real thing, “runner’s high” refers to the feeling of pure elation, reduced stress, and a decreased ability to feel pain due to a flood of endorphins released by exercise (according to google.)
Did you notice that you don’t have to be a runner to feel this “runner’s” high? You can get it just from exercise- getting up and moving your body. Running may not be your jam, but whatever it is, (dancing, yoga, walking) just keep doing it, especially if it makes you feel good. Who cares what that negative inner voice is telling you, Pam, Joyce, Barb or whatever you named her. You do you. Do what you enjoy. Be thankful you have the ability to do what you enjoy and remember, MOVEMENT is MOVEMENT.
In other news, I start my last chemotherapy drug this week, Taxol. I will be receiving this drug weekly for 12 weeks and while it’s killing cancer cells, it’s also likely going to cause joint pain, numbness and tingling in my hands and feet, and some other awesome side effects.
Let the countdown to May 27th begin!
Lastly, as always, thank you! Thank you for your thoughts, prayers, good vibes, well wishes, food, donations, candy, coloring books, everything and EVERYTHING. We appreciate it all.
Love and Hugs,
Sara, Tyler, Samuel and Rowyn.